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Friday, December 5, 2008

The Language of Abusive Churches - Part 1

Does your church (or did your old church) use these words and phrases to manipulate and control the members of the group?
(Compiled by Bill Newcomer and other contributors for the Battered Sheep Ministry.)
Please go here to see the explanations :- http://www.batteredsheep.com/church-speak.html

1 - A bitter spirit* - - - - - - - - Y / N
2 - A family matter - - - - - - -- Y / N
3 - A jezebel spirit - - - - - - - - Y / N
4 - A rebellious heart - - - - - -- Y / N
5 - A rebellious spirit - - - - - -- Y / N
6 - Accountable - - - - - - - - - Y / N
7 - Angry - - - - - - - - - - - - - Y / N
8 - Apostate - - - - - - - - - - - Y / N
9 - Backslider - - - - - - - - - - - Y / N
10 - Bad attitude - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
11 - Because I'm the pastor, that's why!** - Y / N
12 - Black sheep - - - - - - - - - - Y / N
13 - Congregationalism - - - - - -- Y / N
14 - Critical spirit - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
15 - Disfellowshipping - - - - - - -- Y / N
16 - Dissident - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
17 - Divisive - - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
18 - Don't be bitter* - - - - - - - - Y / N
19 - Don't be petty - - - - - - - - - Y / N
20 - Free will - - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
21 - Love gifts - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
22 - May I remind you I am the pastor!** - Y / N
23 - Oh, they just use the doctrine of men - Y / N
24 - Oversight - - - - - - - - - - --- Y / N
25 - Prodigal son/daughter - - - - -- Y / N
26 - Singleness - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
27 - Slander - - - - - - - - - - - --- Y / N
28 - Teachable - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
29 - The truth is here - - - - - - --- Y / N
30 - The "Work" - - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
31 - The "World" - - - - - - - - - --- Y / N
32 - This is a safe church - - - - --- Y / N
33 - Troublemaker - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
34 - Unsubmissive - - - - - - - - - -- Y / N
35 - Unteachable - - - - - - - - - --- Y / N
36 - Unwilling to reconcile - - - - - -- Y / N
37 - We are a "nondenominational" church - Y / N
38 - We don't do things that way - -- Y / N
39 - We don't want to overreact - --- Y / N
40 - We don't want to take sides - --- Y / N
41 - We don't want to throw the baby out with the bath water - Y / N
42 - You need to be open and transparent - Y / N

See Part Two _here_
.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

I'll note that I'm not posting "anonymous"! I know those terms were used alot when I was a kid. I don't know about now....actually, some of them I have never heard of. I left a comment on your prior post (with my name) explaining my situation. I read your (and others) because I want to see where people came from and where they are now. Most of my good friends no longer attend a church affliated with WCG. We are still dear friends and I respect the decisions they have made regarding their beliefs (and they respect mine). I have learned alot from reading these blogs and have gotten information that I had no idea about (things that had happened in the past with WCG). I always have an open mind to hear what others opinions are. I pass absolutely no judgement on anyone and honestly feel bad for some of the things that you and others went through. I totally know that in the past we let HWA and others make decisions for us. And, I know that is not right at all. We are a group of people that went through so many things that others can't comprehend. And, I enjoy reading about what those people have done to work through it.

Que said...

Thanks again...
I guess people can't tell from my blog posts, but I haven't been part of WCG, or any of the splinters. However I nearly got sucked in by COG-PKG after reading their books online. I was saved by a blog called Ironwolf, which is now a forum. The name 'Foresight of Hindsight' is a clue - if people are lucky enough to have some foresight (or learn from others) they might not have to look back at a later date, and wish they hadn't done something that they now regret. (Hindsight is 20/20 vision!)
== Peter ==

Unknown said...

No, I did not realize you were never a part of the churches. And, I was going to send you an email like you suggested, but I don't see an address in your about me section.

Que said...

Sorry, the email address is sort of hidden in a graphic so that it can't be read by 'email address harvesters'. It's that blue graphic with light gray printing - starts with "stones@" and ends with ".nz".
(nz = New Zealand)
stones[at]slingshot[.]co[.]nz